You are saying that only bugs in the service that blocks the port can be used to attack, correct? No other vulnerabilities or attack strategies you can think of?
wrong logins deactivate the service for - let's say - 6h and send a mail to me?
DoS attacks: it's a private system with 5-6 users at maximum. I do not care too much if the service goes down. It is more important for me that the data behind is secure. Do you think that is a problem in that case?
Outsourcing services: Currently, DNS, DHCP, etc. is running on the OPNsense appliance. Why would you put it on another appliance? I have a Proxmox host that I could use. Can you elaborate on the advantages on the security side?
TOTP: Can OpenVPN use TOTP for login? Or are you talking about the login of the OPNsense's web GUI? The latter I would not allow from the VPN connections I think.
Logging / Monitoring: Why didn't you propose Zabbix or monit? Never heard of the applicaions you mentioned. :-)