-I have tested the realtek usb rj45 adapter on other systems(running windows) and have reliable uptime relative to the experience with it connected to the OPNsense box.
-USB is a just another fail point and I do hate the idea of doing it this way. I was really hoping to have a testing box to sort out the learning curve of OPNsense. I want to get a Qotom box or some more appropriate for this application but its not in the budget as of yet.
@CJ - The realtek nics are not going to be used after this headache. I am having to fallback on my mikrotik routers...(as of posting all 3 routing solutions fail at some point.) I am looking at 4 port intel NICs for my medium form factor optiplex 3070 I have laying around. I hope to get a solid build to work with OPNsense. I'll just go the the virtualized route otherwise. On a tight budget.
So I plugged in both mikrotik and BOTH had issues at some point. All traffic stopped at the mikrotik gateway or DHCP on the mikrotik failed to hand out an IP. I updated the firmware, changed cabling/adapters, and still the same issue. I give. *update* the mikrotik 2011's apparently dont let the sfp be used in slave mode. it is what it is. I do have working routers now. I am ordering the 4 port nic and re-approaching OPNsense at a later time. Thanks.