I think the problem is realtek in your case not opnsense. You could hit up ebay really fast with a 20 or 30 dollars and pick up a 4 or 2 port intel network card from ebay. Would be my suggestion to you. Swap out interfaces and try putting everything across intel network ports and set the loader.conf.local and see if the speed moves up. That would tell you if it is realtek network or some other kind of IO or CPU or MEMORY issues you could be having.